Special Officiant of the Civil Registry
Love is the most beautiful thing that can happen to a person. One can talk about love, but you only really know what it is when you feel it in every fibre and every cell of your body. When we got married at the Markiezenhof city palace in Bergen op Zoom in 2004, we had a nice, enthusiastic marriage officiant who beautifully expressed what love can do with you and how!
She inspired my desire to do the same work. And yet years went by before the right moment was there. On a beautiful summer evening I unsuspectingly got a question that would put my entire life upside down. My niece and her then-boyfriend had recently announced their marriage plans and quite unexpectedly asked me whether I wanted to officiate their wedding.
You can read how all that went in the blogs elsewhere on my website.
By now I have shared my love story with quite a few bridal couples, and have been honoured to be able to ask the YES question. Each and every one of them with its own surprising, beautiful, loving story, each and every one was a magnificent ceremony that has captured a place in my heart, to cherish and never forget.
And now that you have decided to get married – Congratulations!
You can look forward to a lovely time now that you are busy with the preparations for your big day. One of the first things that you will want to arrange is a location that is just what you were looking for, a photographer who can capture the right style and type of pictures that speak to you, and of course you will also be looking for THE perfect wedding dress and THE perfect wedding suit. After all, you do not want to leave anything to chance on the most important day of your life – you only get to do it once so you’re not going to work with just anyone, right? So why wouldn’t you look for the same in a marriage officiant?
What do you want for the ceremony, around which the whole day spins, with your YES as absolute highlight? Have you already thought about that? Do you already have a picture of the ceremony, what music you want to hear, will your children have a role in the ceremony and …
who is actually going to marry us?
Marriage officiants in the old days …
Have you ever asked your parents or grandparents what their ceremony was like when they got married? You often hear the same answer: it was boring, uptight, impersonal, and it was over in no time.
It’s the way things used to be … the marriage officiant put on his robe at 9 in the morning and took it off at 4 in the afternoon, had officiated about 12 weddings and had therefore told the same story 12 times, because an extensive talk with the bridal couple beforehand, that was never or hardly ever done. There were generally only three types of speeches: one for young couples, one for slightly older couples, and another for couples that where entering into a second marriage. The speech was usually about the marriage boat that would defy all storms and would never be wrecked. The only personal thing in those stories were your own names. Indeed boring, uptight and impersonal …
Marriage officiants these days …
Thank goodness things are different now! The entire wedding industry is changing, and we as marriage officiants are changing with it. Everything is becoming more personal, people are thinking more about themes and colours that fit with the location, and of course with the bridal couple itself.
This goes for the ceremony too, because as a bridal couple you naturally want a ceremony that fits you and shows who you are. You don’t want a boring, stiff cookie-cutter speech, but an exciting, grabbing story: YOUR story.
And this is where my strength lies. In all the talks we will have with each other, at your home, at your wedding location or anywhere else, we will get to know each other better – not only by listening to what I’m hearing, but also by feeling and seeing. Verbally and nonverbally, listening between the lines. Seeing what love does to people, really feeling the emotions that come with it. This actually transforms itself on its own into a story with a recurring, connecting thread. What is the connecting thread? It can be anything: the way you met, something you say to each other, a common interest or hobby, something that sits or hangs at your home, everything that has to do with you, I use it as an inspiration to create a unique and personal speech for you that I will depict in a surprising way. A speech that gives you the feeling as if we had known each other for years and of which your guests will say: YES! That’s really you!
That is my goal, my strength and my passion. Every bridal couple deserves a unique and personal ceremony with a speech that stays with you, even after you’ve been married for 5, 10 or 15 years, and that you will never forget.